the last sin
  pale ashen sky
a bleary eye
clouds of recurring screams...
i am a zoo
  an octopus leviathan
tentacles into an ocean
of unformed emotions...
syphilis and love  
  syphilitic pall
stifles the clear blue
i contort...
shell and pearl
  amidst highs and lows
in life's ocean flows
a shell peony-mouthed...
i am an unmarried mother
  fed on stings
of barbed milk morality
my child-plankton...
the lovers
  cell upon cell
bridge of their union
hung on the pillars...
  ogre of age
and time cavil
at a warm picture...
the young today
  innocence thaws
at the altar
of ambition...

she’s coming home

tomorrow morning at 8.30 she leaves
the Pearl of the Mediterranean for Cairo
on the French-built turbotrain bridging
first 130 miles between the Pearl and the Orient
and reach home the morning of day after
with this my exile would end

isn’t it amazing you meet a child-woman
25 years ago and see her blossom into a diva
you witness various stages of her metamorphosis
you begin to share bond co-exist merge fuse
then one day you realise you have become one
not the stifling oneness but one that liberates
from the limitations of the self that extends
the inner circle’s outer boundaries
into the azure that sets you free

then one day she goes on a holiday
in fact you egg her to go and feel happy for her
all is hunky-dory for a while
then you notice life slowly draining out of you
you begin to count minuteshoursdays
and lead half a life it makes you see time
in a different perspective the cosy comfort is gone
you get back to basics and try to survive
this too shall pass you tell yourself

then as minuteshoursdays tick
and you realise she will be coming soon
you begin to feel life seep into you
bit by bit drop by drop suddenly you notice
there’s bite in the air spring in your step
your voice is excited and your hunger is back

isn’t it amazing you meet a child-woman
25 years ago and then one day you realise
this child-woman who turned diva
has turned into wife-mother superwoman
all encompassing all giving underpinning
of your being years have added a mellow charm
and a gravity that does not bind but frees

so as i think of her tomorrow morning at 8.30
Alexandria time i begin to feel alive
she is coming home i am complete
and life is beautiful

( 2 December 2005 )